Sticker Shock

Well I start school in a little under a month. I'm excited. I look forward to having something that will keep me occupied...something to hold my concentration for a bit. Books go on sale today although I don't have the money at the moment. I went to see around how much my books are going to cost....I about passed out when I saw the price: $458 and some change. Unfortunately financial aid didn't cover my books which is ok since they covered the rest. I was really hoping that it wouldn't cost that much but that's how it goes. I'll get them at some point. I don't think it'll be this week. I get paid but I have other bills I have to cover first like insurance. I'm rethinking the whole medical insurance thing. It costs me $514 a month. It's weird how the state works it out. What they do is they hire me at x amount of money per year. Then I choose the benefits that I want/need. They tally up about how much that's going to cost and add roughly that amount to my pay. It sounds like it might be a good deal but really it's not. I still wind up paying more because the extra money they give me every paycheck is taxed so that's where the extra goes. Besides I'm only being paid $200 more than I was when I didn't have insurance. It's weird how that worked out. I really needed the insurance but it's getting to be that I can't afford it and pay the other bills I have every month. I worked out a budget and will do fine if I could have stuck to that budget. I forgot about books so it sort of screwed me. On a brighter note, my stepdad said he would help if I needed it. I don't want him to help because things are going to be a little tight since mom's away and all. We still don't know if she's going to get paid for the time she's gone. That's still up in the air. I could talk to dad about it but I hate borrowing money from people. It makes me feel bad and what if I can't pay it back right away? I hate to have a debt like that. My tuition is taken care of so that's a plus. Only had to pay $20 which isn't bad. I guess I could take out a loan but I don't know about that either. It's something to think about though.

I got to see mom yesterday. The place looked like a crap hole but the surrounding area was absolutely spectacular. It's right in the mountains and there's a nice little town near by...one of those older historic looking towns. She seemed to be doing well. They were giving her valium which I thought was odd but they said it's necessary when someone is detoxing. We got to spend about 45 minutes with her and then Mr. Mike and I had to go to a family sort of therapy session. It's mandatory if we want to continue visiting. It was odd...I'll just leave it at that. That took about and hour and 15 minutes and then we were allowed to visit with her some more til around 3. I have to say it was hard leaving her there. I wish we could have taken her home. She's hoping to be home by the weekend. We'll see I suppose. They have to wean her off the valium first. On the way home we stopped in Gettysburg. It wasn't really out of the way. We drove through the battlefield and looked at some of the plaques. It's been about 11 years since I've been there. We plan on going back. I might go in the fall when they have the candlelight ghost walk. I just want to hear the stories. We have something like that here at Fell's Point but it's hard to hear over the crowds moving from bar to bar. I might try and go to that one this year too. We say that every year but it never happens.