Drunk

I don't know if I mentioned it before but my mom has a drinking problem. It's been an ongoing thing since I was a kid and she goes through spurts where she will drink a lot and when I say a lot I mean a lot. She was doing alright there for a while since my step dad had a talk with her about it. She agreed to talk to the dr and she stopped for while. A couple weeks ago she started again and once again it's become a serious issue in the house. I should know how to deal with stuff like this but I don't. You would think considering I've been around in my entire life that I would sort of know what to do in a situation like this. I don't. Every time she starts drinking I get angry. I mean I don't yell or throw things but I find it really hard to have any sort of sympathy for her. I know it sounds mean but I just have a really really hard time with it when it comes to her. If it's anyone else I feel bad for them just not her. I think it might be because she has the means to get help she just doesn't want it. You know it's pretty bad when you wake up in the morning and the first thing you do is go get a drink. She's gotten help before but I guess she thinks she can handle it and can control it which we all know is wrong. Most alcoholics can't control themselves which is why they're alcoholics in the first place.

I wish she could see what she is doing to herself and everyone around her. I'm not the only one affected by it. My stepdad is really angry with her about it. Yesterday morning he took the bottle away from her and she got so angry (she was drunk of course) that she wanted the keys to the car which he wisely denied her. I didn't hear any of this...I was fast asleep. Anyway she took off out the door and walked up the street. He left to go after her but he couldn't find her. (How ridiculous is that. I know I'm being judgmental but I can't seem to help it) He called me a little while later to see if she came back and she had and was asleep. She slept all day on Saturday and most of the day yesterday. Anyway this morning she found the bottle and started drinking again before work which is why she had me drive in. I could smell it but what was I supposed to say? I've never really been able to outright stand up to my mom. It's just something I could never do. I'm afraid I'm going to hurt her feelings or something. I guess it's something I need to work on. I wish there was a way for me to help her but nothing seems to work. I don't bring any sort of alcohol into the house. I don't drink that much myself. I might have a glass of wine or a beer or something like that once in a blue moon but that's about it.

I don't know what to do about her. She's leaving work early which is probably a good thing if she wants to keep her job. I just hope we can get this fixed and she can learn not to drink. I researched a little bit a couple months back but nothing seemed quite right...it didn't fit. I know I'm not the only person out there that has to deal with something like this but it's getting to me. My patience is running thin and I just don't know what to do about it. I know this sounds self centered and I'm not meaning for it to. I just don't know what else to do. I'm at a loss.