Jack of All Trades, Master of None
That's what I'm feeling like at the moment. I don't know about anyone else but I get in these moods where I feel my life is heading in a certain direction but I want to change the course. There are so many things that I want to do in my life and odds are best I won't get to do them all. I don't think anyone gets to do everything they want to do in their lifetime. I mean people can live a full life but I'm sure there is always one thing at the end that you would like to do but didn't get the opportunity to do it. I just feel like I'm being pulled in 50 million directions. I don't know...it's weird but I can't help it. One day I think that I should be going to school. Another day I want to go in a completely different direction like just working at the job I'm at and settling down and doing the family thing. I don't know if this is something that most of this generation is facing or if I'm one of the few that feel that way. I would love to settle down and do the family thing but that's just not an option at this moment but who knows maybe tomorrow that might change. You never know, right? I know there are a lot of people out there that do all of it. I just don't know if I could do that myself. I'd like to think I could but still...maybe I don't trust myself.
Some years ago, I was sitting outside of my job at the time, hanging out with friends, getting in trouble all that you know...anyway I sat down and made out a life plan. It was silly. I was just being stupid; none of it I would ever dream of doing. I was just horsing around. But then I got to thinking: Where am I going to be in 5 years? It's something that changes for me every year. I think about it a couple times and it seems that I change it up all the time. I guess that's why life isn't straight forward and easy. There are things that will happen to you that will challenge where you want to go or how you look at things. I can remember being in 8th grade and my teacher asking the class if they knew what political party we would be joining when we were older. I chose Republican. I don't know why I did..there was another kid in the class that raised his hand and he said democrat. I wonder if he is one? Anyway I think the reason I chose republican was because at the time I thought things were ok when Reagan and Bush were in office. Later on I realized things weren't as honky-dory as I thought and that there was a lot about their administrations that I didn't know about. I think about Mr. Crum and wonder where he is now. I know he doens't teach at the school I used to go to but I'd like to see how he is and for him to see how I am. He's the reason I became interested in history. There were 2 people instrumental in my chosing teaching as a profession. Mr. Crum and Mr. Kineke. I don't think they'll ever know how much they impacted my life.
See what I mean? If they hadn't been there, who knows where I would be. Maybe I would be studying medicine or, Heaven forbid, business and accounting. Not that there is anything wrong with any of those. I just don't think I would be the best person for the job. I still want to be a history teacher but I want to do more with it. There are so many problems out there that I want to fix...so many people that I think I might be able to help but it seems that I can't get out there and do it. It's crazy I know but I can't help it. I think about how fortunate I am and others are and how there are still people dying, killing, etc. It makes me sad that there are children out there dying because they can't get vaccinated. There are kids in this country that are killing for no reason, kids in this country starving, kids in this country turning to violence to solve their problems. It's not a good thing. So I guess I'm just in one of those states of mind where I want to fix the world even though I know that's not possible. The world isn't perfect and will never be. But I can hope that sometime soon people will learn that violence doesn't solve a problem, that everyone has the right to have a home, access to dr's, food on the table, and a job to provide for their families. That's what I want for everyone.
Some years ago, I was sitting outside of my job at the time, hanging out with friends, getting in trouble all that you know...anyway I sat down and made out a life plan. It was silly. I was just being stupid; none of it I would ever dream of doing. I was just horsing around. But then I got to thinking: Where am I going to be in 5 years? It's something that changes for me every year. I think about it a couple times and it seems that I change it up all the time. I guess that's why life isn't straight forward and easy. There are things that will happen to you that will challenge where you want to go or how you look at things. I can remember being in 8th grade and my teacher asking the class if they knew what political party we would be joining when we were older. I chose Republican. I don't know why I did..there was another kid in the class that raised his hand and he said democrat. I wonder if he is one? Anyway I think the reason I chose republican was because at the time I thought things were ok when Reagan and Bush were in office. Later on I realized things weren't as honky-dory as I thought and that there was a lot about their administrations that I didn't know about. I think about Mr. Crum and wonder where he is now. I know he doens't teach at the school I used to go to but I'd like to see how he is and for him to see how I am. He's the reason I became interested in history. There were 2 people instrumental in my chosing teaching as a profession. Mr. Crum and Mr. Kineke. I don't think they'll ever know how much they impacted my life.
See what I mean? If they hadn't been there, who knows where I would be. Maybe I would be studying medicine or, Heaven forbid, business and accounting. Not that there is anything wrong with any of those. I just don't think I would be the best person for the job. I still want to be a history teacher but I want to do more with it. There are so many problems out there that I want to fix...so many people that I think I might be able to help but it seems that I can't get out there and do it. It's crazy I know but I can't help it. I think about how fortunate I am and others are and how there are still people dying, killing, etc. It makes me sad that there are children out there dying because they can't get vaccinated. There are kids in this country that are killing for no reason, kids in this country starving, kids in this country turning to violence to solve their problems. It's not a good thing. So I guess I'm just in one of those states of mind where I want to fix the world even though I know that's not possible. The world isn't perfect and will never be. But I can hope that sometime soon people will learn that violence doesn't solve a problem, that everyone has the right to have a home, access to dr's, food on the table, and a job to provide for their families. That's what I want for everyone.
posted by Kyleen at 7:53 AM
3 Comments:
I agree with you that people need to learn how to solve thier problems without violence.
As well I also know that everyone has thier days where they aren't sure they are doing what they should be in thier lives.
See, this is exactly the problem I have with setting goals:
If you set a goal and fail to reach it then you're going to feel disappointed.
I find it's better not to have any goals and that way you're never disappointed.
Or, as Vince Vaughn said it in Dodgeball: "I found that if you have a goal, that you might not reach it. But if you don't have one, then you are never disappointed. And I gotta tell ya... it feels phenomenal. "
8 )
I like having goals but sometimes I think I put too much pressure on myself. Disappointment can get you motivated to do better. But that's just me :) Goals can be good things as long as you're realistic about them
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